This weekend I got a serious case of jealousy. I don't normally strongly desire what others have, but there is one particular place where I get jealous and want what they have every time I go there. It is not that I want everything they have. I just want their daughters room for my daughters.
To me it is so pretty and my daughters love it. I know they spent quite a bit on it and it is beautiful. Every time I go there I start thinking about all the stuff I want to buy my daughters for their room and how I would decorate it.
Then I come back down to earth. In reality I don't want to spend that much money. I want to be debt free. I also know they are in a significant amount of debt and often struggle to pay bills. I am not using this as a way to make me feel better about things, but to realise that while things may look great on the surface it is not always so.
This weekend once the green eyed monster reared its ugly head again I had a think about what I could do to pretty up my daughters room to how I want without spending hundreds of dollars. I realised there are many things we have that with a little work would transform their rooms.
Looking at ways I can get what I want or achieve what I want for free or very cheap helps me overcome feelings of jealousy.
A few other things that help me are:
- Reviewing my goals. Will getting what I want in my jealous state help me achieve them or take away from them?
- Make a list. If there is something I want it can go on a list. In a month or 3 if I still want that thing I can look for a way to get it. More than likely I don't want it anymore.
- Experience vs stuff. Ultimately we all have too much stuff. Do I really want more stuff or would I rather have life experiences and teach my kids that we don't need stuff to be happy.
- What sort of example am I setting. When I get jealous I think about the example I am setting my children. How do I want them to grow up and what sort of behaviour do I want them to exhibit?
How do you overcome jealousy?